As many rules as necessary, as few as possible. The pitfalls of deregulated sex-positive spaces with a focus on gender inequality

We are pleased to have received permission to publish our friend Anna Mense’s text, which was first published in the *Journal of Positive Sexuality*. Abstract: To explain suffering in contemporary romantic relationships, Eva Illouz (2012) examines the consequences of the separation of erotic and romantic encounters from committed relationships such as marriage. While this separation is often hailed as a triumph of free choice and liberal love, Illouz argues that it creates systemic inequalities between male and female agents. The article uses Illouz’s analysis as a starting point and basis for studying deregulated sex-positive spaces with regard to their risk of involuntarily reproducing features of socio-political domination. The discussion is driven by an interest in the question of how options for exploring sexual and romantic relationships can be developed without reproducing the systemic disadvantages of heteronormative culture.