THE PILLOW BLOG

 

Testimonial for our "Trial & Eros" workshop by Claire
Beate Absalon Beate Absalon

Testimonial for our "Trial & Eros" workshop by Claire

This time we would like to share with you a longer reflection by a participant in one of our workshops. During the wonderful week-long gathering "Touch & Play" in southern Germany, Beata facilitated an intensive session she called "Trial & Eros – Engineering Fantasies and Navigating Playspaces," which was all about figuring out what erotic fantasies you have, how to make them come true, how to use the group and the atmosphere to actually make it happen, how to reflect with others on how it went, and then doing it again—but better! Basically, it aimed to motivate participants not just to float around in a playspace like a jellyfish and see where they end up (chances are it’ll just be a cuddle puddle…), but rather to approach it like an architect or a group of savvy researchers who want to harvest the good stuff and proactively build their dreams.

And here is what Claire experienced...

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Deguiltification – An Experiential Essay by Chris Ifso
Beate Absalon Beate Absalon

Deguiltification – An Experiential Essay by Chris Ifso

Beata and Matís run luhmen d’arc, a company founded in Berlin that creates “spaces dedicated to the manifold aspects of intimacy and desire.” In September 2019, the duo participated in Schmiede, a 10-day maker festival held at the Old Salt Works in Hallein, Austria, which brought together over 100 artists, musicians, digital creators, and writers—including me. Beata is also an academic; her PhD topic is The Art of Sex Education: Contemporary Aesthetics As Idiosyncratic Interventions in Hegemonic Sexual Discourses. As part of her research, luhmen d’arc was there to interview a range of participants about attitudes toward sexuality. Interviewees were also offered an introductory bodywork session. A mattress sits in one corner of this large barn-like wooden studio, behind a flimsy curtain hung on a rope between pillars. I take off my shoes, lie face down, and close my eyes. Beata and Matís proceed to give me a massage that is by turns tender, arousing, rough, funny, and relaxing. I am fully clothed and they are gentle, but crucially, there is no rule against getting turned on. To prove this, vibrators, rope, and masks are scattered around the space for those who wish to experiment further. I purr, laugh, wriggle, and groan as I’m cradled, gently pummelled, and stroked. I open my eyes; they turn on the tape recorder and ask me what the session brought up for me. There I am, a 63-year-old man, relaxed and glowing, lounging next to a young man and woman I like and trust, with whom there is absolutely no reason to feel inhibited. I am among friendly strangers…

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